Tag Archives: humor

mortified

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mortifiedbook_cover_v3John brought me home a funny new book I had to share. It’s called Mortified: Real Words, Real Peolple, Real Pathetic. It’s part of a series of books that have come out of a live stage show.

Real people share entries from their journals, confessions from their diaries and excerpts from notes they passed during elementary, middle or high school. Then the adult version comments on the insane things they said as a youth. (the stuff they wrote and the language is pretty uncensored, be warned if you choose to pick up one of the books)

The site let’s you share your own mortifying stories too. I’m sure if I went though some old journals I could come up with something pretty good! I don’t have anything from when I was younger here at our place, though I bet my boxes of old notes holds some real gems!

I do have some journals from my first years of college though. I looked through them for something I would be willing to put out there for the world to read, but I think I need a few more years to pass! As boy crazy as I was then I think my entries would be best suited for Mortified: Love Is A Battlefield. Now that’s a good way to describe it.

This was a good book for me because I love human interest stories. They are real people and they had these views and opinions and experiences that were very real and legitimate to them at the time but as they look back they can see how skewed their perspective was. Amazing how much of the life and death stuff turned out to be a little less important, eh.

Would you share your mortifying childhood writings on a site like getmortified.com?

cake wrecks

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cakeWhile we awaited the completion of The Office episode we were downloading, um, acquiring from our peers last night, John shared this blog with me. I know my posts have become more about other people’s lives than my own but just indulge me one more time and I promise to go back to writing more often.

I thought of my dear friend Claire who is an amazing cake maker when I saw this blog. Then I thought of a cake experience of my own that I want to submit to the site. My co-workers remember that fateful Team Building Day when our logo lost all its dignity on a background of chocolate icing. If any of you took a picture I think I’ve found the place for it.

Enjoy a good laugh with me, courtesy of Cake Wrecks, “when professional cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong”.

passive aggressive notes

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Thank you, digg.com, for introducing me to a new source of entertainment. passiveaggressivenotes.com has me laughing out loud at my laptop as we speak. You must see this for yourself.

The site is self-described as a blog of “painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over”.

Just to get you started, check this out…
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Or this hilariously awkward use of Facebook to be passive aggressive.

fbpan

And finally, you really have to feel bad for this Graham guy…

exceptgraham

Go to the site, there are so many more where these came from.

datenight, john & sarah style

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I already told some of you this story but it was blog worthy so it’s going on here…

John made supper the other night and then he told me he had a plan for a dessert date. I thought that sounded fun but then he said we needed to go at a specific time and he wasn’t telling me where.

I like surprises but I always try to get the information out of John, not an easy task. So we’re walking over towards Metrotown Centre, which was closing in about 30 minutes,so I am wondering what we are going there for. Turns out John had the inside scoop on the Chinese bakery in Metrotown and the fact that 15 minutes before the mall closes they sell off anything they have left at half-price.

There we were, waiting with about 25 other people… okay 25 Asian women… while the bakery prepared themselves for closing time. At just the right time they tossed bags of buns and boxes of mixed pastries up on top of the cases and people starting grabbing. Even whole cakes were fair game. Everything was passed around, picked up, examined and put back, then immediately grabbed by another bargain hunter.

I can’t decide what I enjoyed more: battling the little Asian ladies for just the right box of assorted tarts or seeing how happy John was with his idea! We spent most of the time laughing. I also got a bubble tea and we headed home with our spoils. Those egg tarts were totally worth the crazed mob. And my huband has pretty good $3 date ideas.

catching up with friends

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We went out with some friends last night, one from out of town and a few from the area. The one who was traveling through leaves today for a 2 year teaching contract in Macau. We had an awesome time eating Chinese food and bubble tea and then chatting for awhile over drinks at the Foggy Dew in Burnaby.

I say all this in order to record a quote I want to remember from the night. Our friend Steve and I were talking about how I had spent most of the meal observing my surroundings and taking mental note of all the small things that were amiss around the restaurant. I don’t do this on purpose, it’s like a mild case of OCD or something. So Steve listens, nods in understanding and then says,

“So you’re like a Jason Bourne, a really slow Jason Bourne.”

jasonbourne.jpg I laughed pretty hard but I didn’t actually know whether to be flattered or insulted! I will miss Steve and his one liners. Have an amazing time in Macau buddy, when I finally make it to Hong Kong I’ll look you up!

where the party’s at

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Campus Days were last week and Staff Conference starts up in Whistler on Monday so this weekend our apartment is the place to be. Four campus staff are staying with us: Brad, Emily, Kolten and Joe.

It’s been non-stop RockBand, NHL 08, food and beers. Our place is admittedly probably too small for more than 3 people and only Emily gets an actual bed but it is great to have some friends out that we don’t get to see often. It’s a major downside to our job situation: we make friends at various events, projects, etc. throughout the year and then we all fly home and don’t get to hang out until the next event. Gotta love the long distance friendships!

milk.jpg Random fact: today at Superstore I saw the most milk jugs ever purchased by one family. You see we live in a predominantly East Indian area (if you know Surrey you know this) and they tend to live in large family groups and cook a lot of curry-like dishes. This requires a great deal of milk. My sisters-in-law and I have a running competition to see who can find the family buying the most milk. This always takes place in Superstore because, well, East Indians love warehouse-style shopping.

Today I witnessed the motherload: 3 carts FULL. I tried to count but I didn’t want to stare. The one I did count had 16 jugs so an estimate for the whole caravan has to be around 48. Not cartons, jugs. I have never seen anything like it. It took a mom, dad and a grandmother just to get it all to the checkout. I wish I had photographic evidence because my sister-in-law with never believe me.

I’m telling you, my weekends are full of crazy things. P.S. tonight I’m cooking Indian food.